RSS

Review: Iron Lung

— by WILLIAM STERR —

120 minutes of inarticulate mumbling in a claustrophobic cylinder, intermingled with four minutes of excitement.

This is another video game-to-movie production. For those of you who are not gamers, or at least have not played the game “Iron Lung,” the movie is basically the game played on the big screen for two hours. And you don’t even get to interact unless you want to throw popcorn.

Much of the universe, stars and planets, has disappeared due to something called the “Quiet Rapture.” Most people are gone, and those who remain are divided into those who accept the situation (Eden) and those who fight it (C.O.I.).

A C.O.I. base was destroyed by Eden, and one of Eden’s operatives was captured. This “convict” (Mark Fischbach) has been chosen by C.O.I. to explore a “blood ocean” on a moon somewhere in space. To explore it, looking for resources that can be used to keep humanity alive, the convict must descend in a makeshift submarine called the “Iron Lung”. In return, the convict will be released and become part of C.O.I.

The descent goes well, but the convict has no way to see around his sub other than to take pictures. To do this he has to leave his control cockpit, walk to the back of the space and push a button. Then, for a long moment, an image appears on the side of the cylinder. Whatever he sees is merely a grainy snapshot of what’s on that side of the sub at that moment. To see more he has to go back to the front of the sub where crude controls permit movement, then return to the back to see whatever the camera can pick up. On top of that, there are no amenities (food or water) and the oxygen supply is limited.

Needless to say, the claustrophobic surroundings, the slow leak of blood into the sub, the abuse hurled at him over the pathetic communication system, and his generally insolent attitude make for a miserable time for the convict and for many of the theatergoers who’ve found two hours of this boring (and vulgar; the F-word is the most commonly used term in the confusing dialogue/monologue we are subjected to).

Director, writer, producer, editor and principal actor Fischbach has, on his first feature attempt, produced something unique. It follows the design of the game (created by David Syzmanski) too closely, with almost no explanation of what has happened before, during, and after the events in the sub. Despite that, it still cost $4 million to make this torture vehicle.

Fischbach, a YouTube star before this outing, does do a remarkable job as the lone participant in 98 percent of the film, but the obtuseness of all involved quickly grows tiring.


Note: The staff used 80,000 gallons of fake blood in the production – 30,000 more than the next closest, the 2013 “Evil Dead” remake. That puts all vampire movies combined to eternal shame.

Runtime: Two hours, four minutes
Availability: Still in some theaters; available to rent or buy from Google.

. . .

Join us on Facebook at
http://www.facebook.com/itsjustmovies!



Your Comment